I have found a ladder under the fallen leaves of my designated wisdom tree. That ladder, could lead my way to all up to the stars; I'd just have to think of one. I see she loves me dearly, but just stands there proud, staring at my clumsy gestures with her great expectations... In fact, what does she want from someone like me? I grew from her roots, in spiral I have made my way up on her rinkles, I've been on her every branch, never knowing where I was, I ripped off her leaves one by one, over and over fascinated that I could whistle the stupid echo of what she must have composed almost an eternity ago... but she kept on smiling, never saying anything and for a while I've been talking to her, telling her everything I could say, I've been talking even in my sleep and content to do so... I went on and on never realizing that in fact I wasn't really watching her reaction; the first time I looked at her, I grew very uneasy because none of the things I was saying seemed to have impressed her, as if I were just a page of a book she had written and I was born from nothing but ink and a goose feather; nobody stands to be more than predictable; I felt small, insignificant, decaying and collapsing in my own self with my self assigned mission to cut off the dying part of my soul with a venomous blade of the wooden knife.This was no usual wooden knife and this was no usual venom;this particular knife was craved out from the apple tree from which the devil chose his fruit to tempt Eve with knowledge, and the venom was from the fangs of the serpent whose shape the devil chose to shatter the mankind's will and obedience to God; I have cut deeper and deeper until I sliced one piece; but was too much to bare, my half words were sliding and drifting on my slippery half soul.
Then, I started to think that maybe she was the same tree;in fact, why not? becoming of the time and shape were mearly a process that had seized to exist right before another one begun; I felt I would never know what was of the essence before I uttered my last words; I knew that I was just a few words away from saying everything I had to say and then my page would turn into nothingness and eternal forgetfulness; this was unbearable!
I felt like I was starting to lose my mind so I left her and never came back, before today...
I tend to forget my very breath, then through the dance of fluttering black and white wings, I fall from such hights that I can feel my ears clogged, my body collapsing and twisting at unthinkable speeds , swallowing the air with my head down, like a mad dragon of the apocalypse. Then I furiously hit the ground in front of her. "Why didn't you tell me?!" But she just smiles...
